Text 6 designing a sales letter

Layout and the effect of the immediate visual appearance is also of great importance in preparing “sales” letters. And again, the “25 per cent blank space” rule is particularly relevant.

Consider the difference in impact of a letter consisting of a full page of solid, unrelieved text, and one with some sentences standing out from the rest, with space around them and between paragraphs. Several of the earlier recommendations for improvements in writing style are even more valuable when writing “sales” letters – for their visual effect now, as much as for their “readability” impact. “Sales” letters can benefit particularly from:

1. short – even single sentence – paragraph;

1. use of short lists (with “bullets” or “blobs”, like this); and

1. headings.

And, whereas the use of underlining in ordinary letters or reports is to be avoided – you should emphasize by choice of words – it is very acceptable in a “sales” letter. Particularly important sales points can also be enclosed in a “box” to attract more attention.

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Typical layout – and content – of a “sales” letter, using short paragraph and “boxed? comments

The layout of a business letter

1 3

2

4

5

11

6

7

4a 8

9

10

1. Reference of the writer. Usually following the pattern HB/SV, though sometimes it is more detailed, e.g. Ref. 3869/JF/3C.

2. Reference of the person to whom the letter is directed. It is helpful to add this when possible as it may mean that the letter is received and dealt with sooner.

3. The date.

4. Name and address of the person to whom the letter is directed.

4a. Alternative position of above.

5. The salutation – usually “Dear Sir” or “Dear Sirs”.

6. The letter itself: one, two, three or more paragraphs.

7. The subscription – usually “Yours faithfully”.

8. The name of the company the writer represents.

9. The name of the writer. If he holds an important position e.g. Sales Manager, Secretary of the company, etc., then this is placed below his name.

10. Enclosures (if any).

11. The subject of the letter. The writer is not obliged to head his letter with the subject underlined: e.g.

Your order No. 178– Zinc oxide.

but it is very useful for reference.

Here are some examples of different types of business letters. Study them.

(a) An enquiry

Clarke & Sims Ltd

High Street

Ellingham

Suffolk

Telephone Ellingham 670S

FH/MC 17^th January 200...

The Sales Manager,

Motorheat Ltd,

Walker Road,

Coventry.

Dear Sir,

We are interested in increasing our range of car heaters and should like to receive information about the various models you are at present producing.

We should be obliged if you would send us your latest catalogue and price list, together with details of the CX4 heater advertised in the current issue of the MOTORING MONTHLY.

Yours faithfully,

CLARKE & SIMS LTD

(signature)

F. Henley

*** *** ***

(b) Reply to (a)

Motorheart Ltd Walker Road. Coventry. Coventry 31043

TB/EW 20^th January, 200...

The Manager,

Clarke & Sims Ltd,

High Street,

Ellingham,

Suffolk.

Dear Sir,

We thank you for your letter of 17th January, asking for details and prices of our car heaters.

We have pleasure in enclosing our latest price list and catalogue, together with details of Model CX4.

Please do not hesitate to write if you require further information.

Yours faithfully,

MOTORHEAT LTD

(signature)

T.Browning

Sales Manager

Enc.

*** *** ***

(a) An enquiry from overseas

Jose Martinez S.A.

Calle Nuevo, 123

MADRID 8

Madrid 19946

Ref. PE 01 21^st September, 200...

The Sales Manager,

Aston Potteries Ltd,

Burston.

Dear Sir,

As it is our intention in the near future to start importing English china and pottery, we are interested in contacting a number of prominent manufacturers in Britain with a view to choosing lines suitable for the Spanish market.

We should be most obliged if you would forward details of the lines you have for export, together with our price list and terms f.o.b.

We should very much appreciate an early reply as our buyer is coming to England next month to visit prospective suppliers.

Yours faithfully

JOSE MARTINEZ S.A.

(signature)

A. Lopez

Manager

*** *** ***

(b) Reply to (a)

Aston Potteries Ltd

Burston

telephone Burston 64469

Ref.GH/JP/Sp.1 27^th September, 200...

The Manager,

Jose Martinez, S.A.

Calle Nuevo, 123,

MADRID 8.

Dear Sir,

We thank you for your enquiry of 21st September. It arrived at a very opportune moment since we have been considering for some time extending our export field to include Spain.

I shall be making an exploratory tour of Spain early next month and shall be arriving in Madrid on or about the 10th. If it is convenient, I could perhaps visit you on the 11th or 12th.

I shall be bringing a selection of samples of the lines we have for export, but to give you an idea of the kind of article we produce I enclose a copy of our latest catalogue.

I should be obliged if you would confirm that you would like me to call on you; in which case perhaps you could suggest a time. I look forward to hearing from you and later to meeting you in Madrid.

Yours faithfully,

ASTON POTTERIES LTD,

(signature)

G.Healthclliffe

Sales Manager

Enc.

*** *** ***

(a) An offer

The Martin Tool Co. Ltd

PV/CH Hammerton Lane

Halifax

telephone Halifax 12343

Messrs Finn and Sledge,

Leicester Buildings,

Hinton Street,

Leeds.

Dear Sirs,

Two years ago you placed a substantial order for some HANDYMAN tool kits, a discontinued line that we had on offer at the time. As we now have a similar line on offer, it occurs to us that you may be interested.

We have a residue stock of 1,200 MOTORMAN repair kits (see enclosed leaflet) which we are selling off $3 at each with a quantity discount of up to 15%, though we are prepared to give 20% for an offer to buy the complete stock.

We are giving you the first chance in view of your previous order, but we should appreciate a prompt reply so that we can put the offer out in the event of your not being interested.

Yours faithfully,

MARTIN TOOL COMPANY LTD

(signature)

P.Vine

*** *** ***

(b) Reply to (a)

Finn & Sledge Leicester Buildings Hinton Street Leeds Tel. Leeds 36943

CC/BN 25^th March, 200...

The Martin Tool Co. Ltd,

Hammerton Lane,

Halifax.

Dear Sirs,

We are in receipt of your letter of 22nd March, offering us the residue stock of MOTORMAN repair kits.

We have checked our own stocks of similar kits and find that they are quite high, in particular KARMAN kits and MEND-IT-QUICK kits. Nevertheless, if you are prepared to increase your discount to 25% for the complete stock, so that we in turn can make a special offer to our customers, then we are willing to buy.

Yours faithfully,

FINN & SLEDGE LTD

(signature)

C.Clutton

*** *** ***

A request to advance date of shipment

Olympic Chemicals Ltd

Varnava, 17

Athens

Athens 33134

Ref: COL/145/4C

The Sales Manager,

United Plastics Ltd,

Langton Road,

Liverpool 4.

Dear Sir,

We refer to our order No. 381 for six tons of processed polyethelene due to be shipped at the end of next month. When this order was placed, our stocks were considered to be sufficiently high to last until December. However, there has been such a demand for this type of polyethylene recently that we must now ask you to arrange for immediate shipment.

As soon as we receive the above consignment we shall be in a position to judge our requirements with greater accuracy and order accordingly.

Yours faithfully,

OLYMPIC CHEMICALS LTD

(signature)

S. Theotocopoulos

*** *** ***

Reply to an order

The Southern Paint Co. Ltd

Grayling Lane

Eastleigh

Eastleigh 236

PL/SB 2^nd May, 200...

Messrs T. Nicholls & Sons,

Broad Street,

Portsmouth.

Dear Sirs,

We thank you for your order No.4743, which is receiving immediate attention and will be delivered within the week. We, too, have had a run on HOUSEMAN paints with the result that we may not be able to supply you with every colour marked on your order.

With regard to your request for the inclusion of this order with your quarterly order, we regret that this will not be possible since it would involve extended credit at maximum discount. What we are prepared to do, however, is to invoice this order separately but at full discount.

We trust that this compromise meets with your approval and look forward to your further orders.

Yours faithfully,

THE SOUTHERN PAINT CO. LTD

(signature)

P. Liston

*** *** ***

(a) A price query

W.Williams and Sons Ltd