Body talk

Communication is not just language, grammar, vocabulary and how to make sentences. Your body can talk too, but it may not speak the same language – different cultures use different body language.

In some societies, such as the USA, you look people in the eye when you are speaking. If you don’t, they may think you are not interested in them. But in many Asian societies it is rude to look someone in the eye, especially a superior. A junior person must always look down when speaking to older people or superiors.

In Islamic cultures and in Asia people eat with their right hand and use the left one for bathroom functions only. It is very rude to give someone an object with your left hand.

In Asia, people use both hands to give something to or receive something from another person. Latin Americans usually stand closer together than North Americans. North Americans only stand close when they want to say something rather intimate or secret. So, for some, people who stand too close seem too friendly; for others, people who stand too far seem unfriendly.

In Asian countries, you do not cross your foot or legs in the presence of a superior. It’s also important to remain physically lower if you are socially inferior. So, when Thai man sees an older woman he may show his respect by sitting down on the only chair. In Thailand, it’s also important not to show the bottom of your feet.

In many societies, the correct response to certain questions or requests is to say nothing.in Britain saying nothing often means “maybe”. A Japanese person often stays silent in order to find out more about the person who is talking. Most Westerners think this means that the Japanese person doesn’t understand so they usually repeat what they have said.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

1. Saying what you think

Think of situations where non-verbal communication is used. What are they?

2. Getting what you want

a. Before you read, decide if you think these statements about body language are true or false.

1. We communicate more with our faces and bodies than our words.

2. The right body language can help you to be more successful.

3. We usually know what our body language is communicating.

b. Now read the text and check your answers against the true or false statements in the exercise above.

How to get what you want

(without saying a word)

You’re looking good. Your clothes are just right. But you’re given the worst table in the restaurant, your partner doesn’t listen to a word you say, and no one but your best friend seems to take you seriously.

What’s going wrong?

Your body language, that’s what. Every move you make and every expression that crosses your face is a far more powerful form of communication than anything you can say in words. In fact, research reveals that up to 80 % of human response to every encounter is non-verbal.

In essence, it is not what you say but the way that you say it. Confident positive body talk can not only improve your ability to get what you want, but even affects the way you feel about yourself.

Psychologist Paul Ekman has shown that negative thoughts and facial expressions create stress even when they are being acted out for research purposes.

Smiling, on the other hand, calms and relaxes the entire body – and has an uplifting effect on anyone who sees it too.

Of course, body language is subconcious. But by becoming more aware of how you express yourself, you can significantly improve your chances of success in any number of situations. The scenarios shown here reveal the wrong – and the right – ways to go about it.

с. Give examples of types of people that could be described as professional listeners.