Chapter Twenty-three

Jessie slipped her light jacket off before walking to Mary Ruth's cabin. It had been cold and damp when she landed in San Francisco, but the sun was shining brightly here. She knocked and heard shuffling in the back of the house.

"Coming," Mary Ruth yelled from inside.

Jessie waited on the porch. Her quick turnaround trip had lasted eight weeks. By the time she made arrangements for someone to look after her apartment, her editor had contacted her with revisions and she worked nonstop, trying to finish the book. She wanted nothing more than to be out of the city. Now, the days were cooler, although still warm for early November. She took a deep breath, loving the crisp smell of autumn.

"Why, Miss Parker, I wasn't expecting you until this evening."

Mary Ruth opened the door and Jessie went inside, where the smell of freshly baked cookies surrounded her.

"I took an earlier flight, Ms. Henninger. Sorry I didn't call, but I didn't think you would mind."

"Of course not. Your cabin's been ready for days. Come into the kitchen, dear. I need to put in another batch." Jessie followed her and her eyes were drawn to the pile of cookies sitting out to cool.

"Try one, Miss Parker. Chris won't mind sharing."

Jessie's heart fluttered at the mention of her name and she looked at Mary Ruth quickly, certain that her face was flushed. "Chris?"

"They call her McKenna. She comes to visit on Wednesdays and I always like to have cookies for her to take home." She put another pan into the oven and turned back to Jessie. "I thought you knew her. In fact, Chris came asking about you after you left."

"She did? Yes, we met while I was here." So, she'd come looking for her. Maybe Chris wasn't as angry as Jessie had imagined.

"Good. She's a lovely girl, so thoughtful. No matter how tired she is, she always finds time to stop by."

Yes, that was Chris. Thoughtful.

"Here, dear. I've got your card all filled out. Just sign at the bottom."

Jessie did as she was asked and wrote out a check. She had to be out by December 20, at the latest, Mary Ruth had told her. All the cabins were booked after that for the holidays.

Jessie left her then, after Mary Ruth had handed her the key and shoved a small bag of cookies into her hands. Cabin number seven was as she had left it, although there was now a small pile of firewood stacked neatly on the porch.

As she unpacked the SUV she had rented, she realized how differently she felt this time around. She wasn't filled with the dread and apprehension that had consumed her in late August. Now, she was actually looking forward to the future, excited about the possibility of seeing Annie and just... talking to her. And Chris. She hoped Chris would give her the chance to explain. Jessie was still filled with guilt whenever she thought of that night up on Ridge Trail. And guilt was an emotion she had not experienced in a very long time. But Chris had offered her comfort, friendship, companionship, everything that Jessie had needed that night. And Jessie had simply thrown it in her face. She had made a mockery of their attempted lovemaking. If she were Chris, she wouldn't want anything more to do with her. But then, she wasn't Chris.

That evening, before dark, Jessie put on her running shoes and jogged to the trailhead of Elk Meadow. It had turned colder as soon as the sun faded from view, and she had pulled on sweatpants over her shorts. She ran, the dusk swallowing her, and for the first time in her adult life, she felt free. No long forgotten memories haunted her, no hatred filled her heart. She was starting over. And she would begin by seeing her mother.

It was after dark when she returned to her cabin and the stew that had been simmering all afternoon was ready. She took a bowl and a glass of wine to the back porch and ate there in the silence of the forest. She didn't hear the owls and she wondered if they had left when the weather turned colder and gone to lower elevations or if they had simply moved on to better hunting grounds.

Later, she put on her jacket and walked to the stream, making her way by the light of the moon, her breath frosty in the night air. She peered through the trees and saw no lights from Chris's cabin. Was she at the Rock House having dinner? Was she still working? Jessie shrugged and turned back. It wasn't Chris she was here to see.