If jealousy is hypothetical the situation may be resolved by means of a sincere talk.
There are many experiences in life that at times leave us emotionally overwhelmed. At these times, we walk around feeling emotionally charged up and filled with tension. Jealousy is one of those situations. When these experiences descend upon us, we feel emotionally frozen. We find ourselves stuck in a state of despair and pain. At these times, talking can help.
There is a word that captures how talking helps—catharsis. Talking leads to a catharsis, which means a feeling of relief. The charged feelings within us become less charged.
Vladimir Levi, a famous psychologist, advised couples suffering from jealousy of one of the spouses to turn jealousy into everyday routine, e.g. organize verbal “shoot-outs” for 20-30 minutes every evening. Every time spouses should provide new arguments, make it inspiredly and regularly. In some months the couple gets fed up with the process of jealousy itself, they run out of new arguments and this “obligatory” jealousy doesn’t cause lots of emotions and doesn’t lead to great rows.
If a person is not into talking at all and still suspects the partner of committing adultery, the best way out is to turn to a private detective.
If jealousy is unhealthily ferocious and a partner understands it, the jealousy entails therapy, not abuse.
Morbid jealousy is a symptom of a psychological disorder. It may take the form of a delusion, an obsession or an overvalued idea, or combinations of these. The nature of its form, and other features evident from the history and mental state examination, should reveal the underlying diagnosis – or diagnoses – and allow appropriate management.
A range of biological and psychosocial options are available for the management of morbid jealousy. These include medication, psychotherapy and hospital admission.
Medication
When occurring alone, as in a delusional disorder or in the context of schizophrenia, delusions of infidelity may respond to antipsychotic medication. Obsessional jealousy, whether part of a depressive illness or not, may respond to selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors.
Psychosocial interventions
Cognitive therapy is effective in morbid jealousy, mainly when obsessions are prominent. Also endorsed are couple therapy and individual dynamic psychotherapy. Dynamic psychotherapy has a place in the treatment of morbidly jealous individuals in whom personality disorders with borderline and paranoid traits are present.
Substance misuse should be addressed where necessary, using standard accepted methods such as motivational interviewing.
Admission to hospital
When morbid jealousy gives rise to appreciable distress, a significant risk of harm or is not managed satisfactorily by out-patient treatment, admission to hospital may be necessary.
Women tend not to exercise any kind of abuse and hide their feelings especially regarding jealousy.
Very often women don’t voice their fears about their husbands’ infidelity especially if they have children. They usually believe that they will be able to regain control over their husbands’ hearts and return them into their real families. Such wives neither abuse their husbands verbally or physically nor break off the relationship, because relationship is a high-stakes game for women – most of them have a strong emotional and financial bond with their husbands that is difficult to break. Therefore, it is close to impossible for them to muster courage to improve their lives.
Children need more love, care and proper upbringing so that their jealousy doesn’t turn into abuse.
According to psychologists, there are many ways to prevent abuse in children:
Reducing the rivalries between children.
Setting ground rules to prevent emotional abuse, and sticking to them. For example, making it clear you will not put up with name-calling, teasing, belittling, intimidating, or provoking.
Not giving older children too much responsibility for younger kids.
Setting aside time regularly to talk with children one-on-one, especially after they've been alone together.
Knowing when to intervene in kids’ conflicts, to prevent an escalation to abuse.
Learning to mediate conflicts.
Modelling good conflict-solving skills for your children.
Modelling non-violence for your children.
Teaching children to "own" their own bodies.
Teaching them to say “no” to unwanted physical contact.
Creating a family atmosphere where everyone feels at ease talking about sexual issues and problems.
Keeping an eye on kids’ media choices (TV, video games, and Internet surfing), and either joining in and then discussing the media messages or banning the poor choices.
In general, children just need more attention and their jealousy will not be fuelled.
Abuse in most cases is a matter of psychological disorders that is why abuse may stem not only from jealousy.
Very often a man hides his real identity behind nice courtship. A woman falls into his trap not even thinking that the love of her life has impulse-control problems. When they get married and commit themselves to live happily ever after some problems begin to develop. If the wife has done something wrong, or has said something wrong, or even looked wrong he starts screaming obscenities and she ends up slapped, or kicked, or even strangled. Therefore, any small thing can result in the man being beside himself with rage and jealousy is not always the case.
Conclusion
To sum everything up, jealousy is really one of the main reasons for domestic violence. Thousands of women die every year with the “help” of their husbands. Still, abuse cannot be limited to jealousy. Being caused by psychological disorder and dysfunctional view on family life as a result of sexual and physical abuse in childhood, abuse can be triggered even by the wrong look. Therefore, abuse is fuelled by a number of behavioral, emotional factors that cannot be boiled down to jealousy.
Personal view
As far as I am concerned, jealousy doesn’t entail abuse, it IS abuse.
First of all, it is abuse towards oneself as he tends to invent some stories that don’t exist and fuelling his low self-esteem, suffer from that.
Secondly, it is abuse, physical, psychological, sexual, towards one’s partner.
Last but not least, it is abuse towards society, because lack of trust disrupts families and, consequently, cripples out society.