First Time for Everything Karin Kallmaker

"Fine, so you got the babe again." Evie was growing tired of Hana's strut. After all the boasting of her prowess, this morning Hana had been utterly zonked, looking like she'd crawled to their cabin with her last ounce of strength. "I still say that Zi wore you out."

"Like I said last night, she was all over me. Putty in my hands."

The woman sitting next to Evie at the blackjack table said, "That's not what I heard."

Evie did a double-take, then remembered the leggy blonde leaving poolside just as she had strolled up to see how Hana was faring with Zi.

Hana leaned in aggressively. "Oh yeah? What did your friend say about me?"

"Zi implied that if there was putty it was very, very mutual."

"I gave her a good time."

Evie raised a placating hand, knowing all too well that once Hana got her dander up, there would be no peace. "I'm sure you did, but I don't think it's very nice for you to be talking about it where anyone can hear you."

"Just tell her I want my T-shirt back," Hana snapped before stalking off.

"Why do you hang out with that Neanderthal?" The other woman was playing two hands and set chips on each queen she'd just been dealt.

"Good cards," Evie said, avoiding the question. "Two ladies are always lucky."

She laughed and brushed luxuriant blond hair over her shoulder before extending a hand. "I'm Felicia, by the way. Zi and I are roomies. She did say she and your friend had a good time yesterday afternoon, then parted ways."

Charmed by the engaging smile, Evie nevertheless didn't want to gossip in detail about her best friend. "Hana is not the type to be around for breakfast."

Felicia's eyebrows arched in what could have been exaggerated agreement or skepticism. Evie was going to have to ask Hana for more details of her tryst with Zi, but in private.

Two women crossed the casino to buy chips. Evie had seen them before—the tall brunette was extremely eye-catching. Heads turned as they passed.

Felicia whispered, "Isn't that...?”

Evie shook her head. "No, but she certainly looks like it in profile. There—see?"

"Oh, you're right. Wow, though. She could play her sister. What a gorgeous body."

The brunette grinned down at her girlfriend, who gave back a megawatt smile that left Evie feeling envious. Belatedly she realized the dealer was waiting on her, so she scratched the table to get another card. Her luck at cards held when she busted with twenty-four. "They look happy."

Felicia gave her an odd look, just long enough for Evie to appreciate the purple-tinged blue eyes. "You know," she said slowly, "if you hang around with someone like Hana, no one's ever going to know you're a romantic at heart."

Startled, Evie tried not to frown. She was used to being in the shadow Hana cast, but she hadn't realized women might think she was like Hana. She was unlike Hana in a number of ways, some of which she just couldn't admit. She changed the subject. "How come you look familiar?"

Felicia's smile was a mix of pride and chagrin. "Do you watch much TV?" She was dealt a five on the first queen, hit again and busted with an eight. The second queen drew a nine, but the dealer revealed twenty and swept up all the chips.

"Not a lot, no."

"Well, I was on Survivor last season. One of the ones voted off in the middle as Most Likely to Be Forgotten. On the reunion show even Jeff Probst couldn't recall my name."

"How could anyone forget you?" Lovely eyes, Evie thought, and that smile. Hair that would be wonderful on your stomach, and satiny, long arms.

Felicia shrugged. "They just do. I'm the girl that cashiers look right past when they ask who's next in line."

"They're all fools." Realizing she was about to blush, Evie indicated the blackjack table and said, "I'm about tapped out for today."

"Lunch buffet ought to be underway," Felicia said. She gave Evie a direct look of invitation.

"That sounds great."

A few short minutes later Evie found herself speculating that Felicia might be vegetarian based on her choices of greens, lots of edamame beans and tofu chunks while passing up lightly grilled fish and chicken. She herself couldn't resist the sea bass with lemon and basil. "I am already overeating."

"Why not? Next week we can get back to the grind."

That Felicia worked out was evident in the muscles in her upper arms and firm shoulders that peeked out past the lace trim on her tank top. She was an attractive woman, Evie had to admit, and she wondered if there was any chance she was as available as her roommate had been for Hana. Not that Evie had that kind of move and confidence, but maybe if they got to know each other, by the end of the week maybe...

They drifted toward a cluster of tables for two some distance from the piano player and were greeted by a server offering to bring them water, coffee or tea, or anything they liked from the bar. They both opted for water and settled in.

"I hope this isn't a boring question, but what was it like being on Survivor?"

Felicia's face crinkled into a smile. "It was really fun. Frustrating to find out about two hours in I'd been excluded from all the burgeoning alliances. As usual, everyone just looked past me. The best I could hope for was being the expendable fifth wheel. I was cooked by day two and decided to enjoy the experience. If I had to do it over again, I'd take control of my own fate, at least. I lasted as long as I did because I could climb up for coconuts."

They chatted about wilderness living and their hometowns— Felicia lived in Santa Fe, not far from Zi—then turned briefly to their work. A long day's drive from Denver, Evie thought, not that she was thinking about any future or anything like that, it was just that when you meet someone and think they're attractive the mind does some basic math. After laughing agreement that talking about work really sucked, they drifted to movies and concerts.

"I know it's almost a cliché, but I love the Indigo Girls," Felicia admitted. "They don't often come through Santa Fe. You're lucky. They get to Denver nearly every year. They make me feel embraced, you know? The music keeps me close." She shrugged. "I don't know how else to describe it."

"I'm a bit of a Joan Jett kind of girl." Evie couldn't imagine listening to an entire recording of folk music, not when there was rock and roll.

"No!" Felicia feigned surprise. "Weren't you in the mosh pit at the Chain Maille concert?"

Evie blushed. "That was likely me, yeah. What did you think?"

"That sometimes heavy metal is pretentious, but those girls live had me from the first note. Raw dyke energy—gotta love it."

Evie's attention was distracted by the couple just to their left and slightly offset so she saw them more directly than Felicia. The very femme woman wore form-fitting shorts and a halter top that covered everything but somehow suggested it could fall off at any moment to reveal two really lovely breasts. The butch across from her appeared mesmerized by the ice cube the femme was trailing along the curve of her neck. She rolled one shoulder suggestively, and Evie thought she detected the outline of nipple rings.

Felicia had been saying something but, Evie realized belatedly, had paused to see what had Evie distracted. She followed Evie's line of sight just as the femme leaned forward to say, perfectly audibly, "I'll let you touch me tonight, but you have to wait until then. I'm going to make it very hard for you to wait."

The butch visibly gulped and at the same time Evie thought fervently, "Lucky her!"

For a moment she thought she'd said it aloud, but was certain she hadn't. She just as well might have for the knowing look Felicia gave her.

"They seem to have a fun dynamic working for them," she said in a low voice. "Is that what you like?"

"Uh, no, not really, I..."

"Are you sure?" Felicia suddenly seemed very cool and appraising, her expression a match to that of the femme at the next table, who was looking at her butch like she was going to eat her whole, one orgasm at a time. "Have you explored that?"

"No... I'm kinda butch. It's not..."

"Oh, please." Felicia rested back in her chair, her color rising. "Your Neanderthal friend puts out that air too—butches don't get on their backs. But she apparently liked it just fine."

"Well, yeah. Hana isn't stone. But she's not a... you know."

"A bottom? And you are?"

"Butches aren't—"

"Why not?"

"Because. They're just not."

With a flick of her gaze at the couple next to them, Felicia said, "That one is. And she seems to be really happy."

"Well, um... Hana always says..."

Felicia gave her a long, steady look. Evie broke into a sweat. She couldn't speak and her heart was pounding so hard she couldn't hear the piano anymore. Finally, Felicia said, "Drink the water. You're going to need it."

Evie gulped down the remainder of the glass. What did Felicia mean? The temperatures outside were hot and they'd all been warned about dehydration, but she didn't think that's what Felicia meant at all. But she couldn't mean ... that.

As she set the glass down, Felicia leaned forward and whispered, "If you're good I will let you do more than touch me."

"Damn," Evie exhaled. She felt vulnerable and confused, but her crotch was suddenly so tight she couldn't quite think. "Don't play with me."

"Oh, honey, playing with you is exactly what I'm going to do."

Felicia resumed eating her salad as if she hadn't just knocked the breath out of Evie. The other couple left and Evie hardly noticed. She managed to swallow more of her lunch and they resumed their conversation about music. She had just begun to feel more normal again, and had decided her mind had just been playing tricks, when Felicia asked casually, "What's your safe word?"

Evie choked on a mouthful of citrus rice. When she was able, she said, "I don't have one."

"We'll have to see about that."

She said it, just like that, as if planning some kind of power sex date was something one did over blue cheese and water crackers.

The server cleared their plates and offered dessert wine from the bar, but they both demurred.

"Zi is doing rehearsals for the talent show at the end of the week." Felicia paused in the broad hallway that led to the shops. "Our cabin is empty all afternoon. And we have a signal worked out."

"I don't know what to say." It was the literal truth. Evie wasn't indifferent to some casual sex, but there was nothing casual about how she felt.

"Say 'Yes, Felicia.'" She moved closer and Evie realized her neck and shoulders were mottled red and her mouth looked swollen, as if it ached to be kissed. "Say 'Yes, Felicia, take me back to your cabin and do anything you want to me.'"

Yes was trembling on the tip of Evie's tongue. She could taste it, all the slick, sweet, salt of that yes, the heaviness and ecstasy of that yes. It seemed stupid to think at that moment about what Hana would say if she knew her best buddy wanted in the worst way to get topped by an anything-but-forgettable femme, but she worried about it as she always had, and it was the one thing that had never let her get this close to yes before.

Felicia moved close enough that a deep breath would have brushed her breasts against Evie's bare arm. "I would really like to explore you, explore us. Besides, what happens on the high seas, stays on the high seas."

It was the little joke, the sudden humor in Felicia's eyes that decided Evie. She didn't want a cold, detached experience with a woman intent on servicing or breaking her. Humor was warm, and making a joke, even a light one, was a gesture of vulnerability.

"Yes, Felicia," Evie said, her tone thankfully even.

Felicia slipped an arm around her waist. The rest of the world became a blur of gold and beige. Into Evie's ear she whispered, "Say the rest of it."

Evie's tone was no longer steady as she added, "Take me back to your cabin and do anything you want to me." Her body flushed cold.

Felicia exhaled noisily and let go, but not before Evie felt her shiver. This wasn't one-sided, she realized, and that, too, was important.

Felicia's cabin was on the deck above the one she shared with Hana, but still an exact replica except for the small porthole between the two narrow beds. It let in filtered light that shifted as the ship rolled over the waves. Felicia closed the door then turned Evie to face her.

"I really think we should have a safe word."

Felicia's hands were hot on Evie's cold shoulders. She was scared but she didn't want to stop. All her fantasies had been nothing like this. "I don't have one. Really. I've never done this ..."

"I promise we're not going to do anything you don't want to. If things go well we can play harder or differently another day. But today..." She brushed her lips against Evie's. "Today I'm going to enjoy your body. But there must be a safe word."

"Honest," Evie said. "It's not that I want you to hurt me or anything. If I say ouch or wait or stop I mean it. I don't want to play like I'm not liking what you're doing."

Felicia nodded, and if anything, she seemed relieved. She ran her hands over Evie's arms as if to warm them. "Then for right now, I think those are excellent safe words. I will listen. If you say don't or not that or stop or anything like that I will hear you. I will stop. We might not be able to start again. And you must understand that if you don't say any of those things, I will assume you like what I'm doing. And I won't stop."

Her heart pounding and her hands feeling like ice, Evie said, "I understand."

Felicia's hands moved quickly to her shoulders and she pushed Evie downward. For just a moment Evie resisted, not understanding.

"Get on your knees." Felicia's voice had gone throaty and deep.

She decides. Evie sank quickly down. She didn't anticipate Felicia's next move, but she was deeply pleased when Felicia pulled her face into the crotch of her shorts, the seam rubbing against her lips. Felicia smelled hot and wet, and the cold flush turned to molten desire as Evie imagined the shorts out of the way and Felicia rubbing her cunt all over Evie's face.

"Oh, I like your greedy mouth already." Felicia worked her fingers into Evie's short hair and pulled her head back. She looked down into Evie's eyes and said softly, "Are you okay with this?"

"Yes," Evie gasped. "I've always wanted this. Like this."

"Pull down my shorts and panties."

She found a side zipper and eagerly slipped her hands in to bare the lush, powerful hips. Felicia stepped out of the clothes, and Evie appreciated for the first time how lovely Felicia's legs were in sandals, especially naked. Curved lines of muscle swept up her calves to the firm fullness of parted thighs. Felicia lowered herself to the edge of the cabin's only chair and spread her legs wider. Evie had a scant moment to take in the beauty of Felicia's sex before the hand in her hair tightened and she found her mouth full of wet, luscious cunt.

"Lick me," Felicia ordered.

She didn't need to say it, Evie realized, but being told added to her soaring pulse. She pushed her tongue in, parted the ripples of skin, and sought out the delicious, slippery wetness inside. Felicia tasted wonderful, and she was very obviously aroused. At the first touch of Evie's tongue to her clit, Felicia's legs jerked, but the hand in Evie's hair was unrelenting.

Felicia rubbed her cunt over Evie's face, and Evie again realized that this moment was nothing like her fantasy. Felicia was in control, which Evie realized meant she, Evie, had permission not to be. Permission to like whatever Felicia would do. Permission to enjoy sex this way. All the other labels of who she was became irrelevant while Felicia controlled the moment.

To move lower and stay with the grinding rise and fall of Felicia's hips, Evie had to spread her knees apart and that, too, excited her. If not for her own shorts she thought she might have dripped on the floor. Sucking and licking, worshipping Felicia's cunt was the sexiest, most erotic thing she'd ever done. Her whole life until now seemed like foreplay. This was what she wanted to do and how she wanted to do it. If her knees ached, she didn't feel it. When Felicia began to hump and moan, jerking upward toward Evie's mouth, Evie wanted to push fingers inside her, but she didn't have permission. She would have to earn that permission, and that idea turned her on further. Her tongue circled and circled Felicia's clit, and swirled lower and harder when Felicia arched.

"That's right, make me come with your tongue. Don't you dare stop until I come on your face."

Evie hadn't foreseen that while submission had her heart pounding and clit throbbing, it was also strangely quiet. There was no other noise in her mind but that of her mouth making contact with Felicia's cunt, and the crooning lilt of Felicia's voice. There was no moment in time before this one and she could not anticipate a future. Now was what mattered, and for the first time in her life the word ecstasy made sense. She felt it, deep and quiet, powerfully contained in a place she had always controlled. She wanted to teach Felicia—or someone like her—the secret pathway into that part of her.

Felicia came against her mouth with an earthy cry of delight.

There was luscious dripping wet on her chin and chest as she panted against Felicia's thigh. She'd gone down on women before and not felt like this. Her head spun as if she were high and the disbelieving thought persisted: You are this turned on, this hot, and all she did was order you onto your knees.

The grip on her hair had eased slightly, but was still strong enough to turn her face into Felicia's thigh. Evie laughed as she realized Felicia was wiping her chin for her. She couldn't remember which comic had pointed out how good the thigh was as a napkin.

Felicia laughed too, rich and easy. "For a first timer, you have the hang of this."

"I'm trying," Evie said quietly.

Felicia met her gaze and the world narrowed again. "Goddess help me, Evie. You give me such ideas when you look like that."

"Like what?"

"Like you'll let me do anything."

Evie nodded. Her head was clearer so she said, wanting to be certain of it, and honest, "Well, not everything. Whips scare me—not in a good way."

"I don't own any," Felicia said. "Not my thing. I'm quite comfortable with ouch as your safe word."

Evie laughed a little and finally felt her knees protesting the position. She said nothing, but it might have shown in her face because Felicia ran a hand down her T-shirt to cup one breast.

"Stand up."

Trying not to move stiffly, Evie still appreciated Felicia's helping hand.

"I'm sorry," Felicia said abruptly. "I should have thought of a pillow for you."

"It's okay."

"No, it's not. If I'm the top, I should be thinking of those things."

"There's no question that you're the top," Evie said. Blood rushed to her knees and she instantly felt better. "But I really am okay."

Felicia's fingers tightened on Evie's hard nipple as she pulled Evie close. "I have a confession to make." After Evie's inquiring look, she went on, "You're not the only one having a first time. I've never topped anyone before."

Surprise made Evie's jaw drop. "You could have fooled me."

"I'd thought about it, believe me. A lot. But I didn't know if I could pull it off. When I saw that other couple and the look on your face I got all... inspired, I guess."

"Am I that readable?"

"You were to me. That look got me hotter than anything I've ever felt in my life." Her fingers twisted Evie's nipple. "Is this okay with you, my responsive butch bottom?"

It was okay, suddenly, Evie thought. She finally made sense to herself and that was all that mattered. If Hana had a problem with it, that was Hana's problem, not hers.

"Yes," Evie said easily. There wasn't a quaver in her voice or in her mind. "This is okay with me."